Funny

 

Funny quotes and aphorisms:

 


Lady Nancy Astor: “Winston, if you were my husband, I’d poison your tea.”
Churchill: “Nancy, if I were your husband, I’d drink it.”

Author: Winston Churchill
Topic: Wife, HusbandFunny
Other Languages


“Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.”

Author: WOODY ALLEN
TOPIC: WifeFunny
Other Languages


“I want a man who’s kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?”

Author: Zsa Zsa Gabor
Topic: Men, WomenWealthFunny
Other Languages


“When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it’s longer than any hour. That’s relativity.”

Author: Albert Einstein
Topic: TimeFunny
Other languages


“He had a clear conscience. Never used it”.

Author: Stanislaw Jerzy Lec
Topic: ConscienceFunny
Other Languages


“I’m so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.”

Author: Muhammad Ali
Topic: Self-confidenceFunny
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“Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon.”

Author: WOODY ALLEN
TOPIC: LifeFunny
Other Languages