Quotes and aphorisms about wives:

“Bigamy is having one spouse too many. Monogamy is the same.”

Lady Nancy Astor: “Winston, if you were my husband, I’d poison your tea.”
Churchill: “Nancy, if I were your husband, I’d drink it.”

“Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.”

“My toughest fight was with my first wife.”

“When a woman marries again it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again it is because he adored his first wife.

“My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.”